Selfish

Reaching out
To say hello,
Such a selfish
Thing to do.
All was lost,
Nothing gained.
Burnt embers
Of a roaring flame,
Smolder constantly.
A void,
Both hot
And cold,
Never lets me
Say goodbye.
The pain
Both sweet
And sad,
Won’t let me
Say hello.

Constantly Dying

I keep thinking
It’s all gonna
Finally be okay.
That I’ll forget
Those dark hours
In the middle
Of my days.


I keep hoping
I’ll finally sleep
All through
The night.
Oh, the things
I could do
If I could sleep
Through one night.

I keep wanting
Mom to stop crying,
Dad to start trying…
And To feel,
All the while,
Like I am not
Constantly dying.

Dying from everything
Living in in me.

Can’t do this,
No more…
Can’t be anything
In this life,
Except
Through.

I love you all.
Even Dad.
Especially Dad.
Tell the girls
To do better
Than me.

Life’s too short
To live it
In hell.
But too long
To be in agony.

Don’t forget me,
Don’t miss me.

 

Writing and Photographs. All mine.

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